Spunky-Roo

My deepest apologies for the past few weeks of no blogging. I guess I have had writers block. Or rather the fact that I don’t want to have to write about what I am about to write about. Which is super confusing, but par for the course.  Frankly… it sucks. But I guess its one of the many stages of grief and I just have to get on with it. Please excuse the mistakes in spelling and poor grammar because I won’t be proofreading this one before I post it for fear of uncontrollable crying (not like I ever do that great of a job anyway-ha!) 

Its been a few months… since July 18^th actually, that our very special family pet Spunky went to doggy heaven. When I was 20 and working at WalMart taking baby pictures I used to chum around and chat with all the WalMart employees that would walk past my studio. I had such fun visiting with a few of them we actually became friends. So when I found out that Michael and Mark his partner were moving out of state I was super disappointed and a little sad. That’s when they offered me Spunky. Really? A dog? You betcha. They explained that the place they were moving into would not allow pets and they needed to find a new home for him. I was their gal. At first I tried to change Spunky’s name to Max or Buster but to no avail. He was Spunky… my snaggle toothed, pug faced wiener dog… and I loved him instantly. They weren’t sure exactly how old he was but it didn’t matter. Over the years he was there by my side through marriage, two pregnancies and my father’s battle with cancer. He was always supportive (albeit stinky) and loved me no matter what. He kept the crook in my knees warm at night and I miss him terribly.

The girls (especially Kyra) have struggled with him being gone too. But it seems that everyday it hurts a little less and the great memories overpower the stingy tears. I finally was able to put up a picture in the house and here I am writing about him. I need to remember to celebrate him not keep the emotions locked up. It just sucks. Kyra cried the most when I told them but Bella cried the hardest. She was devastated when we finally told her. She begged for us to bring him back and after a few hours gave us an ultimatum… If you cant bring back my “dead dog”… I need a baby brother or a new girl dog. Straight faced and with all sincerity… it was heartbreaking and adorable all at the same time. Via didn’t struggle with him being gone really at all. I think when it was all said and done she was relieved that he was not around because towards the end there Spunky was nipping at the girls. It was only a matter of time before he got ahold of one of them and really hurt someone. I suppose its not totally his fault because the girls loved to pick on him. Not in a mean way but they just wouldn’t leave him alone. They used to dress him up, put jewelry and crowns on his head and even donned his royal leash leading him around the house. Miss Via was totally amazed by his “boy parts”… my kids are a breed all their own I swear.

Its odd too what will remind me of Spunky. Like the other day I was mowing the lawn and realized I didn’t have to pick up stay dog poop out of the grass. Which was a relief and a bummer all that the same time. OR when I came across one of his Halloween costumes and priced it for the rummage sale. I kept his Harley Davidson jacket and his collar. I had to. (and I had him cremated. Shhhh- don’t tell my mother- she thinks its creepy. Talking about creepy- originally I was going to have him stuffed… now that’s creepy- but I would have loved it). It breaks my heart, and I miss him a lot, but it was getting to the point where he couldn’t do the things he wanted to do. Mr. Spunky-Roo lived a nice long life (11 years or so) and next his buddy (my dad when we were on vacation) went to heaven on the afternoon of July 18^th. It was sunny and warm and I was assured that he drifted peacefully to sleep… his favorite place to be. 

Party People-- Vegas Style

Brad (Tim’s brother from LasVegas) was here this weekend along with his son Dominic. Jen and her son Robert were also able to make it to try a Wisconsin summer… and from what I can tell it has yet to disappoint them. There was even a thunderstorm with crazy down pouring rain (which Brand mentioned out in Vegas would have been flood conditions). To clarify: Jen is Brad’s girlfriend of the past few years. If you remember, his ex-wife Tara and I got along swimmingly… two little peas in a pod. So when they split it was pretty hard to me to think about becoming chummy with “someone new.” You could even use the term resistant. However, I have to say that Jen is pretty awesome. We were able to visit with them a lot this visit actually and we spent plenty a night playing cards into the wee hours. Well- they did. I joined in a few times too lol. Kyra had fun hanging out with Dom (although it was Jade’s week with her so it wasn’t as much time as I am sure she would have liked). We even had a cute little Family Reunion-style get together on Saturday where everyone brought a dish to pass and we just hung out all day… and ate---yes! The food was so good. Lucky for us we rented a shelter with tables and an awning right smack dab in the middle of Bay Beach (our little local amusement park) so we could run around and work off some calories in between the brats and macaroni salad hahaha. Speaking of running- I felt bad because when I was said and done we were loading things back into the vehicle and Andy (one of my brother-in-laws) was nice enough to dump the hot coals into the cement containers at the edge of the park. Unfortunately, this particular receptacle was already occupied by a whole army of hornets… who were all to happy to fly out immediately and let Andy know they had dibs on the place. It turns out he got stung a handful of times and thank goodness he is not allergic like his mother. But gold star to the Bronanders—who carry epi-pens just in-case. We let the cranky squatters settle down before we went back to gather all our grill parts (which made it through unscathed actually) and I made my way to a nearby ticket counter to let the girl know I needed to speak to a manager. Now… I am totally tempted to go off on a tangent and tell you all the horribly unprofessional things this manager (at the ripe age of maybe 19) told me about what she could and couldn’t do… argh. Needless to say after a good 20 minute wait and a request for “an adult” I was met with an actual manager who address the problem and took immediate action which included asking if my family member was in need of first aid… I guess he didn’t see the ambulance drive away??? No, just kidding… but it makes me all crazy and angry to think that someone could have been seriously injured and nothing would have been done for almost a half hour… I am going to try not to write the city a note but its super tempting. Argh. I digress. So after the attack of the killer hornets, Kyra, Jen and I (cause Miss Paula was taking care of her hubby) went out and got our nails did. The first place was closed. Bummer. Next place? Closed. Third place? Open… didn’t think to check the price… well, 90 dollars later and some pretty pink toenails we were all pampered and relaxed. Oh yah, except my checkbook. Oh well… this just encourages my rummaging and price-matching at WalMart.

Weird Wisconsin Weather

We all know that Wisconsin is an area that Mother Nature just cant make her mind up about. One day its cold and the net day it can be 30 degrees warmer. Rain and sun in a 30 minute span... maybe that's why we have so many closets full of clothes...At least that's the excuse I am using this week. Most recently there have been crazy wind storms that have blown through the area. One of my very good friends at work had power knocked out for days which after considering life without power seems absolutely horrible. Luckily it hasn't been crazy hot this week (unlike the 90s of last week). We were on our way to bay beach and saw this giant tree on its side. It got ripped right out of the ground! Things like this only remind me of being a kid and my genuine concern that giants messed with people while they slept... yup- pretty sure it happens.

Old School Days

I am surprised she even smiled for this picture. I guess it was lucky for me that I took it before she realized what she was getting into. One of Kyra’s favorite things to do is her annual couple of days at Heritage Hill, the local historical park. She has always loved getting dressed up in “olden days” clothing and doing various activities related to the particular camp she had chosen that year. This year though was another story. She got home in the afternoon and was hot. Not like temperature hot, but hot liked pissed off. Great!!! It turns out that she was the oldest girl in the group. “Mom you signed me up for a baby group!” Hell no I didn’t… its not my fault that there no other kids her age. When in fact there certainly were, she just didn’t like them. She thought they were mean. For no other reason than they wouldn’t talk to her. Well that’s probably because she wouldn’t make eye contact and didn’t seem friend=ly. I think she forgets that all girls are going through the same thing as her. And it sucks. I get it. But how can you be angry that no one likes you if you don’t let them even try to get to know you??? Or worry that they are judging you if you don’t even try to engage them. Argh. I guess its easy for me to say because I am an adult. Not to mention that I wasn’t the most normal teenage girl. I definitely worried about what people thought about me. Either they liked me or they didn’t.  I guess I just was a bit intimidation (honestly I was mean to them before they could be mean to me).  But not EVERYBODY… I hope. Life is hard. I feel for her for sure. I just wish I could help her realize that none of this crap is going to matter in 10 years.

On a lighter note, the little girls had a great time tagging along and dropping Kyra off at her summer camp. They even stopped and showed off their pearly whites for momma. Oh! And by the way… On the second day the “mean” girls were enthralled by Kyra and followed her around for hours. She loved it.

Official Teenager

Today we celebrated Kyra’s 13^th Birthday. I am excited for her based the fact that she is so stoked about getting further from childhood… but teenagers are a whole ‘nother world from the little girls that I have become accustomed to. Although like it or not, I need to acclimate to this new turbulent environment and batten down the hatches cause this sh*t just got real. So it seems like the day she turned thirteen her body decided to get all hormonal and her emotions took off on this roller coaster. I tried hard to give her solace but frankly I am just not built for this coping technique. She just wants to talk things out (which I am okay with) but when I give her possible alternatives to resolve her issues, she just tells me no or points out the flaws in my plan. So after a few afternoons of her bawling her eyes out for no apparent reason (that I could identify) and hours of uneasiness, I did what I thought was best and signed her up for counceling. So far its been good. I find myself tempted to ask her what they talked about but I know better. That's what I get for telling her it would be confidential and nobody needed to know but the therapist and her. harumph. I get 12 free sessions for her through work, so this will be an adventure (I love the kid and want her to be happy). We had her birthday party at the park close to our house which was great because we didn't have to travel far that way. The little girls had fun playing on the toys and the adults got to visit. Kalli and Cassie were camping this weekend so they were not able to make it. I know its hard for Kyra being so much older than the little girls but she takes it in stride most days. There was cake... presents and laughs... what else could be better? Oh and by the way... Kyra has a little boyfriend. I use the term little because it diminishes the seriousness for Tim and I and that way it doesn't seem so real. Ah!!! She's growing up too fast. But I guess we are lucky because when I asked her if she had her first kiss yet she just looked at me (like teenagers do) rolled her eyes and said :He doesn't even like to hold hands Mom." YES!!! Hopefully we can snake out a few more years of this :)

Where's that Ball???

What can I say… she’s just not an athlete. Not that she is not athletic at all, she just thinks that everything should come second nature and easily. And in this case, it just doesn’t. Kyra has found soccer the past few years to be quite challenging but she has taken it in stride and made some serious progress. I fear though that this may be her last year. She is feeling the pressure from her teammates and coaches to “be” someone she is not. She cannot tune out or organize the demands between the two and is finding it super hard to play. I don’t want to her to feel like we are forcing her to participate, but Tim and I both truly feel that being part of team sports teaches kids social dynamics. I realize that she may feel less than adequate but that’s part of growing up. So we shall see how this all unfolds next year. I have to admit that I wouldn’t mind just having one child in soccer over the summer for a few years. And if Kyra doesn’t love soccer anymore than I appreciate her giving it a shot for a few years. However, I do think that it is important for her to do group activities with her peers. Maybe we can find a teen drama class or something along those lines. It doesn’t matter to me what she does, as long as it doesn’t involve laying on the couch with one of her various electronic devices all day long.

6 Years and Counting

Well we are officially 6 years into married life and although it has not always been wedded bliss, I am still happy in the choice I made to marry Tim. Now don’t get me wrong, there have been times (many infact) where I shook my fist to the sky’s questioning why people are stupid enough to get married… its work. But I guess everything good in life is indeed work and when you quit nurturing a relationship it can’t grow. And that’s what we did. With the girls growing up and various work and school obligations, Tim and I grew distant… not realizing that duh??? We needed time together too (and not always with babies). Why not have a date night here and there you ask. Honestly date nights can be a bit tricky because we already impose on our families to watch the girls during the week… so to ask them to watch them on the weekend feels like we are over-using their generosity. However, once in a while Tim’s aunt Karla will offer to watch the girls on a Saturday night and then watch out- its game on. The irony of date night is that we usually don’t know what to do with our “stolen” free time. Movie? Dinner? Bowling? Walk by the bay? Its funny that when it comes down to an agreed upon activity we are at a loss… which I consider a sign that we need to communicate more--- I am thinking spreadsheets or pie charts of interests and see where they overlap (no I would NEVER do this--- just a silly joke my friends). Well Karla was indeed generous enough to offer some free childcare for us on this particular Saturday so that Tim and I could go out and celebrate our anniversary (on the actual date mind you) which was super de duper awesome. Again, we struggled a bit with what activity to share overwhelmed with possibilities I suppose. WE decided on dinner and fishing. Yes- fishing- WELL outside my comfort zone but I am totally into it- crazy right? I know! So we went to Pizza Ranch for supper (not classy living but it was something we were both craving so why not feed the urge) and then headed to buy our worms and set up our spot. When I was reaching into my purse to grab the money for night crawlers I noticed I couldn’t find it- anywhere… no!!! Turns out I left it across town at the buffet. Awesome. Well there goes that purse I thought. Now having flooding thoughts of what credit cards I would have to cancel and all the different business cards I would loose not to mention the cash… argh. However, it seems that the stars aligned just for me and I was spared- this time. I guess what better place to leave your purse behind than a publicly sponsored Christian pizza buffet… go me! So after walking out with my tail between my legs a smile on my face, we finally got out to the river and threw the bobbers in… and it started to rain. Really? Baloney. Its not like it was super hot and the rain felt good. No it was overcast, chilly and now we were damp. And after an hour still no fish. It sucked, but we were both happy because we were together. If nothing else… we had some great discussions (debate at times of course) and realized that although it may not always seem like it, we are still madly in love with each other and going strong. Thank God.